i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
