So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize