their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
