There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize
