Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
whose parrot is this?
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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