I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
