Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
