Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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