Got a toothbrush?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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