I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Randomize
