I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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