Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
