I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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