So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
