He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
