Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize
