If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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