Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize