Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize