We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
