so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize