so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
someone owes me an orgasm
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
