shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
this boner is exhausting
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
3 2 1 whiskey
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize