It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
