Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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