is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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