Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I came so hard my ears popped.
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