it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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