youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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