at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize