This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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