I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
