I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
