yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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