But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Randomize
