You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
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