I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
