operation have a gay friend backfired
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
