its not stalking. its research.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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