I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
