Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
