Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
