my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
