Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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