:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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