I'm gonna have a badass scar
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Randomize
