Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
