I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
