spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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