I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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