We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
