32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
