I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Randomize
